I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
