I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
