he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
