I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize