What a fucking waste of an outfit
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
