He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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