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Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
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