it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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