Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
