yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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