just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize