haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize