matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
