She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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