one two three fourrrrnication!
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
