"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
