He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize