SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
