Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
