Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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