Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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