Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
so much tequila, so little girl.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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