Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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