I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
zippers are such a cool invention
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize