so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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