I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
