i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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