Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Randomize
