just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
50% drunk capacity currently
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
