Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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