You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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