i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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