it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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