new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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