Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize