well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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