they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
