We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Randomize
