I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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