Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
