It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
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he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
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IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.