Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight

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(312): View more from Illinois

You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?

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(212): View more from New York

I'm drive I can fine osifer

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(858): View more from California

that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(603): View more from New Hampshire

he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.

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(916): View more from California

I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.

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(214): View more from Texas

Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.

(1-214): View more from Texas

I love you.

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(516): View more from New York

Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself

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