I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize