When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
