Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
