"it" just moved
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
