She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize