In the future we'll all be gay
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
