The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
