Buhtt sex?
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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