Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood http://tfl.nu/k7f1
  Replies (1) Good night (1275) Bad night (1775)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker http://tfl.nu/gudl
  Replies (11) Good night (1793) Bad night (3516)
• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (361): I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness. http://tfl.nu/49ei
  Replies (11) Good night (1416) Bad night (4047)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan http://tfl.nu/hlq0
  Replies (24) Good night (1547) Bad night (3435)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1 http://tfl.nu/3zzc
  Replies (11) Good night (3488) Bad night (963)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  my sombrero is too big for the bathroom

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): my sombrero is too big for the bathroom http://tfl.nu/okhq
  Replies (25) Good night (9508) Bad night (1269)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights http://tfl.nu/27p8
  Replies (21) Good night (3193) Bad night (2575)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape. http://tfl.nu/9ahj
  Replies (3) Good night (3340) Bad night (1023)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life. http://tfl.nu/b77w
  Replies (12) Good night (2299) Bad night (1104)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (940): You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole http://tfl.nu/t9xv
  Replies (15) Good night (3018) Bad night (1093)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me. http://tfl.nu/3kcp
  Replies (5) Good night (1496) Bad night (1844)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad? http://tfl.nu/r4ig
  Replies (14) Good night (1424) Bad night (2125)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I wish there were birth control emojis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): I wish there were birth control emojis http://tfl.nu/p00p
  Replies (16) Good night (622) Bad night (927)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand. http://tfl.nu/relm
  Replies (6) Good night (1248) Bad night (669)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update http://tfl.nu/adag
  Replies (2) Good night (626) Bad night (288)

Randomize