Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
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This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
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I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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