Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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